Hi AprilRain,
I have an Autism diagnosis from 7yrs ago & a Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) one from 4yrs ago. I agree with my Autism diagnosis, and feel that it fits very well for me. But I do not agree with the BPD one, and don't feel that many of the symptoms apply to me. I have recently managed to get a senior psychiatrist in the hospital system to confirm that I don't have Borderline Personality, even though I do have a couple of traits, she said that it is the Autism that is causing most of my difficulties. My case manger, a mental health nurse accepts this opinion, and is trying to help me to get appropriate treatment based on this current diagnosis. However it is difficult as my assigned psychiatrist still thinks I have BPD, as does my current GP. My local hospital is still managing me as if I have BPD, but has admitted that their current management doesn't seem to be working, so hopefully is open to change.
I think that the BPD label is too readily given to people who present in crisis, without consideration of what is normal or everyday for them. I was first diagnosed with BPD during a time of intense stress related to bullying at work, because I had suicidal ideation several times. This was supposedly enough "red flags" to get a diagnosis. Then after over a year with few mental health issues, there was another stressful bullying situation, and I had frequent suicidal ideation. I also had what my GP termed as a "loss of control moment", but on reflection could be better explained as an Autism "meltdown". The hospital psychiatrist diagnosed me with BPD the 1st or 2nd time I saw him.
My GP who had known me for 4years and saw me regularly, disagreed with this diagnosis. Like your psychologist, he explained that he took into account all the times that I had been going well, not just when I was at my worst. He said he thought I had some Cluster B personality traits, that at times showed like BPD. Sort of "part time" BPD - where the traits are there all the time, but are usually under control and don't cause issues, but sometimes show up as though I have BPD.
There are overlaps between symptoms of BPD & Autism. But for me the Autism was ignored & they would label my difficulties as BPD. I feel this misdiagnosis has not been helpful and so my condition has been mismanaged. Even now I feel that the mental health professionals are more concerned about managing the Cluster B personailty traits such as difficulties with emotional regulation - as they want me to behave better in hospital. They are still ignoring the Autism which is the underlying cause of my difficulties. I am not in hospital most of the time, so it doesn't make sense to focus on the things that only occur when I am in hospital. There are lots of other things I have difficulties with on a more frequent basis, and not having ways to manage these things means that things build up to the point that I seek help at the hospital. It would be better if I could get help to manage these things so it never gets to me going to hospital.
I agree with @Teej that BPD has a very negative sterotype, and stigma especially from mental health professionals. It is like they think that people with BPD are being deliberately demanding, uncooperative and manipulative. Like Teej said I think it is important that we are each treated like a person, not a diagnosis. Each person with the same diagnosis has different experiences, symptoms, and priorities. Because of nurses negative views of BPD, I have had hospitals set rules restricting my access to services, and ignoring me even if I am admitted, causing minor issues to be often escalated to a lengthy admission. If they worked with me to explore what my difficulties are, they would find that using strategies to help with my Autism-related difficulties with communication, social relationships, and overwhelming emotions would mean that minor issues could be resolved more easily by spending time actively listening.
I think it is worth getting a correct diagnosis, so that your condition is effectively managed, but it probably doesn't matter as much what they label it as - as long as they understand what traits/symptoms you have.
