Good Morning!

[tyme]

I'm sorry to hear about the bullying @ENKELI . I can see what an impact this has had on you.

I hope you find a job soon. One where you are respected.

[Glisten]

@ENKELI  The temperature is much more pleasant today and a good South Westerly blowing.

 I have 0 tolerance for negativity. Life is hard enough without being oppressed by negativity. Negativity, enough of it, damages your brain 🧠 physically changes it not in a good way. That’s what happened to me.

YAY for neuroplasticity 🎉 You can fix your brain 🧠 That’s what I’ve been working on since August 2023. It works, I didn’t even know it was working until @tonys told me.

He is an amazing friend that I completely trust. Babysat me through some dark days.

Forum is great people.

G

[ENKELI]

@Glisten thanks for your words.

I managed to go to Coles and do some shopping, picked up meds (my chemist is great, he always puts a smile on my face) and am planning on what I want to do on the weekend.

Yes the breeze is welcome relief, I still have the fan going but it's not as stuffy as the last few days were.

I've been asked to house sit in 2J for my aunt and I'm not sure I really want to. I suppose it would be something different to the routine!

How's your week going?

Shout out to @tonys, he truly is a kaleidoscope in a black and white world ❤️

[ENKELI]

@tyme thanks lovely. Last year was just a series of rejection, hate and bullying and I was glad to see the end of '23. 

I know I need to find work but I still feel scarred, which I feel is silly because there are people out there who have had it way worse than me. I've always been sensitive (so my mum tells me) but I feel the last few years I've been even more so, probably because I am older, hormones drying up lol. Plus I had mostly worked in places where I was liked and respected. The last place I worked is well known for it's bad management and behaviour but I was hanging in until I found something better. Then my dad called me and asked if I would move to NSW to become his full time carer after my stepmonster had a stroke. I had a meeting with HR where they neglected to give me advance warning so I could get my support person to be with me and bullied me for 35 minutes until I told them I'd do what they wanted and resign. They didn't even give me time to collect my stuff, just grabbed my belongings and threw them into a couple of boxes and then escorted me off the premises. I figured I would have been leaving soon enough anyway and then my dad decided he didn't want me to be his carer anymore so I was left without a job, money and with the feeling of not only my former boss and HR hating me, my dad thinking I was not good enough too.

In tears as I write this as it's still raw.

All things work out for the good and I will survive this, I just wish I didn't have to.

[TAB]

@ENKELI  that was me 2015 re no job, no home, lost and ideas of being fathers carer. Glad I didnt do that re father, ?Hes gone now. 

Forget bosses / job make your own choices , could have just walked and given them the finger inrear view mirror, Ive prob done that 100 times. just a job. fix resume and referees up and move on..

2023 tabs not worked in 2 year , but trying to. bought house w inheritance, still breathing. got workplaces ringing me. just wish was able to say yes and back it up.

Things will get better for you ..

[Glisten]

@ENKELI  I’m still searching for a regular sleep pattern. It is my biggest hurdle. 
My focus, mood, productivity = sleep.

If I haven’t had 5 - 6 sleep, by the afternoon, like now, I start going sideways.  I have to Deep Breath or do Square Breathing via YouTube or podcasts to retrain my mind and my nervous system. Ask @tyme about the Walking Amygdala, loves it.

Finding the right schedule for the gym, last night was way too late.

The calm app seems to be the most effective.

I need to pick up my meds as well, thanks for reminding me.

@ENKELI don’t feel obligated to house sit. Do because you want to. Ask yourself ‘what do I want to work on?’.

What are your priorities?

Prioritise you and what you need to do for you.

Be your own best friend and if in doubt, write a letter to @tonys he misses nothing. 🔎🔦

G

[ENKELI]

@TAB yes it was just a job but it paid my mortgage and car. I have less than 12 months left on car and 18 months left on mortgage. 

My low self esteem voice tells me not to bother applying for jobs outside what I know and even when I've done the role before I still think, I've got extensive dental work that needs to be done, who wants to hire someone with broken front teeth (meds made my mouth go dry and caused my teeth to break and fall out. I'm too embarrassed to smile).

I wish I could just stick my finger up but fear rises again.

I feel stupid justifying myself, sorry about that.

[tonys]

Mmmm    OH boy  @ENKELI .  There's a bit to unpack after reading the days mail.  

Best I start with,  thankyou so much for your lovely words.  And  @Glisten .   You know how to 

get me beaming a big smile .  Thankyou my friend.   

I'm so upset with  the bulling part of your letter.  Mate I just want to tear these guys a new one.  If you leave

your job under the pressure of bulling . . .  'You may have  case'.   I have delt with a case similar,  and 

help the fellow win it. Its called a   'dismissal at law'  .  Actions that make the workplace untenable,

such as verbal abuse,  interfering with your property and tools of the trade, homophobia, racism.

Of course I don't know any of the details and it has been years since I delt with union and H R

matters,  But If you talk to legal aid, do a little research. . .  who knows.

You don't have to fully win the case.  These dismissal matters are usually partially settled before it becomes  

just too time consuming for the employer.   If you kept a diary,  thats considered a legal document

and its all you need.  I took on a mall owner who said my large fire scarred frame was scaring 

customers out of his restaurant and other shops    Between you and me. .  he had a very good point.  But the way he went about it.  Well lets just say it was an expensive lesson he'll not forget.

The point being , its worth a legal look into every wrong that's inflicted upon you.

THE BANK..   Urrrr ,   I hate banks too.   So, Banks are finding it less expensive to accept less from people than pursuing them and there are people that specialize in these negotiations between 

parties..

I could tell straight of  that you a soft caring fella.  Not enough of them in this world.  We need 

folks like you or mankind just isn't going to make it.  Mate,  my heart goes out to you.

I hope that you keep me updated on all you are going through. . .  You  and  me..     WE don't

go down without a fight.   I hope a few others that are more experienced with these matters 

chip in here too.

Hang and please stay in touch @ENKELI   "angel'   Still love that..    your friend      tonys.

Have to write to you a little later  @Glisten .. Head just ran out off words n I'm hungry.          tns 

 @Former-Member   @Appleblossom  Hope you don't mind me tagging a couple of others on this  Enkeli..

[TAB]

@ENKELI  i had few falls over last 6 mths. Last on lost 2 front teeth .only cost a few hundred for patch up job. 

Hope you can get some help to sort things out

[ENKELI]

@TAB thanks, am going to see if I can get in to my dentist, find out how much it will cost. Last time I went to the dentist before I lost a few teeth the quote was just over $6000. 

Asked my dad for a loan, he reckons he can't help. After all the rejection and disappointment I shouldn't be surprised. Should be grateful he's still alive.

Feeling like I am sliding back into my depression again, not sure why.

@tonys thanks for your words my friend. I did look up disciplinary action etc regarding my old company and I decided it was better for my mental health to let it go. I tried to go the owner of the company for bullying but because he only bullied me once I couldn't report him. Same for my manager. I could have gone both her and HR for not letting me have my support person with me during the meeting but the sly way the meeting was set up I didn't think I'd need to. Screw it, I lost so much last year I just want to forget about it all. At least I was able to leave negative reviews on Google and Seek about the company - they have a rating of about 1.4 and are struggling to find staff because they have such a bad rep so I am smug about that.

Still waiting for my GP to get back to me after I requested a refill of anti anxiety meds...hurry miss Jane (if anyone even gets that reference I'll be impressed!)

Hope you're having a good night mate, you are a rare diamond.