@WIP ! Hold your horses! Day 3 is the hardest in that it is the make or break day!
Today, being day 3, is the day when you can try something different. In the past, your day 3 was when you spiralled downhill. Knowing that, how about make this day 3 a day where you will work against your comforts and reach out instead?
I can empathise with you when you went and saw families, couples etc at the dog park. I have felt that way before, but then later realised, 'if I don't enjoy my own company, how can I ask anyone to enjoy my company?' This was a turning point. I reflected, and realised I needed to demonstrate self-compassion for myself, and be satisfied in myself. Now, I'm not worried whether I'm with someone or not, because I am content in myself. I bring that contentment with me whether I am with someone or not. Secure relationships and bonds may be what you desire, which is a beautiful thing. Now, you need to work on where you currently are, and determine the stepping stones or bridge to get to that ideal you.
Remember, I am not a super human being...I am very ordinary. Yet I am proof that coming out of depression is possible. If only I had a comparison to show you.
Hold on tight my fellow-soldier and friend!
There is light.
BPDSurvivor
