Lived Experience Forum

[karma36]

Hi all, I'm new here:)

In 1997 I was diagnosed with schizophrenia, while my parents and life had initially been difficult, life has in the last few years become much better. I was fit & healthy at school and did well in classes. My dad was particularly agressive at times, not violent, but verging on psycho, crazy, angry with me.....he never was like this with my sisters and I felt it definitely affected me. Also I had friends die while at school, 2 mates in a car accident, in senior school, and a chinese girlfriend in primary school. My mother is a workaholic and I always remember the fact she was never around or very supportive, or more to the point, motherly. Anyway I felt these things (stressors), a long term girlfiend break up and occasional drug use in my teens led to the difficulties I faced with schizophrenia...Since then I worked a ton of jobs, none of which I liked, having anxiety, initially, mild depression, until I decided to do something which I would find creative, interesting and ultimately pay the bills rather than dreaming and working as a electronic musician. So I went back to uni studied design and I.T, which after working my butt off for the last 5 years meant that I'm now in a career I love (web design and development) and around some of the brightest and well off, compared to many. It's just I've got to the point where ....and this has happened throughout various jobs, that I ask myself should I tell anyone? They have a diversity and inclusion program at work, but I still think talking about schizophrenia is very difficult and many people don't have a clue about it.....Also Since being diagnosed I have gained a ton of weight, only loosing some relatively recently, after changing medication to  ....... I still get very hungry and both the condition and weight gain have made me quite self conscious and sometimes anxious in larger groups. I've also been single for 18 years.......so I don't know really what to do? Would they help me? I don't believe I need anything that other employees don't have, but rather, may be support and understanding if I don't always want to meet up for drinks (Every week) and feel anxious in large groups, flying occasionally and being self conscious.....not sure....Occasionally I do still hear hallucinations but I'm able to concentrate on other things and they're not so prominent in the brain anymore and generally go away after I get home for my nightly dose. Anyway it's a bit weird because I can do my job well, have lots to offer and I don't nessessarily need time off (all the time) but still I have a fairly chronic condition to many...

Any advise? Or experience letting the employer know about these things?

[Kurra]

Hi @karma36
There has been considerable discussion in the last few days on this topic. It's in the Our Experience & Stories and is titled 'Covering up' Do you do it? I'd post the link but I'm on a mobile phone and have no idea how to do so (Ssh - I'm old).

As you will read I have always been out there about my bipolar which does involve psychosis at either extreme. Personally I believe the most important thing is not to do anything unless you feel comfortable about your decision and any potential repercussions that might arise.

Have a look at the other thread and please don't hesitate to continue this discussion here or alternatively on the other thread.

Hey! I'm so glad you found us here. It's an excellent forum with wonderfully caring, considerate and helpful folk. We're interested in helping you and ourselves. See you around again soon.

[utopia]

@karma36. I guess it depends on a few things.
What exactly do you hope to achieve by telling them?
Who would you tell? Your boss or coworkers?
And what would you tell them?

I'd probably tell them that I get anxious in large groups. People can understand this.
Some people may be very understanding and may even disclose their MI. Others have a fear due to lack of understanding about Schizophrenia.
Have a look at the link @Kurra mentioned. It's a great conversation about just this issue.
I wish you well regardless of what decision you make.
And I have to say - it's great to hear a ppositive post about living well with your MI.

[april]

Hey @karma36

Congratulations on landing on your feet and best wishes for your career. Your story is very encouraging to me.

I was also diagnosed in 1997. I have Schizoaffective Disorder and Anxiety Disorder.  I have been unable to work for the last 15 years mainly due to my illness. Have recently been applying for jobs and I am at a loss how to explain the employment gap in my resume.

When I was working I often became anxious in certain situations and even went to work when I was very ill . Though mangement and other staff were very happy with my work, the pressure of keeping my illness a secret took it's toll on me, so I resigned.

I now feel that at this point I should have told them. Hiding the illness had not worked for me.

Since your symptoms are at a minimum, perhaps you need not tell your employer.

In the end it's a personal choice. Best wishes whatever you decide.

PS I have gained lots of weight too.

[karma36]

Thanks Utopia, I think you're right, it may cause more issues trying to tell them everything. People understand anxiety much more......and you see I would like to get promoted and quite often I think people can think you're not capable when we have a MI......which def isn't true.

[karma36]

Thanks April!

I got around the resume gap buy making things up like freelancing or running my own business and also said I took 2 years off to travel the world that way it looked like I had life experience and to some degree was a go gettter......I also had time off around 3+ years to deal with it....I also use to get really anxious around people and going outside. With CBT, taking my meds and gradually moving to more modern meds, with exercise and lite 'n' easy I have lost a some of weight but sill find it hard.....I went to university which is really what made the difference to my career. I would recommend any good education to anyone to help associate with people and gain skills in an industry. I also found study, yes, hard but also fun, rewarding .....

Hang in there and 'keep on keeping on' and keep trying! You never know what's around the corner particularly if you work at it and gain a qualification......Best wishes to you and thanks for your comment

[Former-Member]

I'm a bit scatty atm, so sorry if I haven't understood the above posts,

But don't tell them you have schizophrenia/bipolar/psychosis, you could say maybet anxiety or perhaps depression, but nothing else. They won't understand and they will just judge you.

Trust me from personal experience. It was horrible. My boss wouldn't look me in the eye and I got bullied and eventually fired (cause I was a casual and too sick to do the work).

I'm just starting a new job next week and I'm trying to work out what to say to explain my regular doc appts and slight cognitive sluggishness and memory issues.

[Nearly80]

No!  Absolutely not.  This is something very personal and fragile to you.  If you do it you run the risk it will be spread through out your work place.  You become vulnerable to those who would use it to mock you, and not always in jest.  It would not lift your esteem in bosses eyes, rather the opposite.  Every one out there all have their own problems.  Don't risk this with any one.  Would you recognise narcissistic behaviour if you saw it ?

Re-consider only when you meet someone who gives you good eye contact and convinces you they are genuinely interested in you and care about you  and invite you in.   Nearly80

[LSeven]

Hi there.

I'm new and in the same boat you, sort of. I dont have schizophrenia but i have similar issues in my life.eg. anxiety, major depression and leukeamia.

Not knowing your background and not being a workplace advocate, it would be beneficial not to tell your boss unless the employer has 'certain' diversity options entrenched in the workplace.

You can always exist working in parrallel with things - thats my way of things right now. Get your health under control (emotional and physical) and all is sweet.  Thats what they tell me. haha.  I am in a constant battle to make this happen. 

Back to you: unless your workplace accepts and supports people with mental health issues, punch on with a support group that best fits you - i have just joined today and i think it may be awesome for me.

happy in health to you.

LSeven