Skip to main content
Crisis Support
Forums Home
Illustration of people sitting and standing

New here?

Chat with other people who 'Get it'

with health professionals in the background to make sure everything is safe and supportive.

Register

Have an account?
Login

cancel
Showing results for 
Search instead for 
Did you mean: 

Our stories

gensys
New Contributor

Hello! This is totally new for me.

I don’t usually talk about this stuff— ever— with anyone. So it’s a massive thing for me to do this, but here we go!

 

I have never really addressed the traumatic things, and abuse that’s happened to me. I’ve always suppressed it— not worried about it too much.

 

That was until last night. Last night I was watching some YouTube. The video did have trigger warning but I dismissed it. Usually I don’t get triggered but abuse was brought up and it triggered me— I started crying, and needed to listen to music to ground myself again. 

 

That’s never happened to me before.

But I’ve started to think on the other things that have happened that might be connected— and I just didn’t realise.

 

Sometimes, but not often, I get auditory hallucinations, too, but it’s never anything bad. But most of the time I feel it coming, my body sort of feels tingly, and sometimes my body movements that should be natural feel foreign, and my thoughts get super loud and everything feels noisy and busy and fast.  Sometimes I can block it out and continue what I’m doing, other times I have to stop.

It doesn’t bother me too much when it happens, it hasn’t happened in awhile.

 

However, something else happened a few months back that I haven’t experienced before. I was laying in bed, and I started to feel weightless, like my body slipped away. Like my consciousness was just floating? But I was still fully aware. It wasn’t a dream. 

I saw a flash image of in my mind of two people. A woman with long dark hair was sitting down hugging her knees next to her was a man with blonde hair. 

 

He said, ‘Hey! Are you hungry?’ 

I heard him in my mind clear as day. He had an American accent which I remember thinking was kinda cool. 

And I said, ‘Yeah! A little bit...’ 

And then I realised I was having a conversation with someone in my head and pulled myself out of that headspace and started freaking out. I could hear the woman speaking too, but she was so quiet that I couldn’t make out what she was saying. 

 

It felt real, and for some reason I think I know his name? I feel like his name is Matt for whatever reason. It hasn’t happened since— and I haven’t heard him since then. But never in my life have I seen those people before. 

 

But its these weird things that happen that make you feel a little bit crazy at times, hence why I don’t speak about it. 

 

I don’t really know where I was going with this, lol, but it feels good to get it out at least! 

I haven’t sought out any professional help because I’m not entirely sure that I need to?

 

Maybe it’s all connected but maybe not. 

 

Anyways. Whoever stuck around and read my wall of text— thank you! Has anyone else experienced something similar? If so, please share your story with me! 

It’s all so hard to explain properly, but hopefully someone gets it. 

 

Thanks for reading guys! ❤️

9 REPLIES 9

Re: Hello! This is totally new for me.

Firstly - welcome to the forum @gensys Smiley Very Happy

 

It is very brave of you to post here about something so personal for your first post Smiley Happy

 

Whilst I cannot relate to what you have experienced I can see that it has had a big effect on you. You say you have not sought professional support because you feel you do not need to but it might be something to consider to talk through what you have experienced.

 

We all react to trauma and unusual experiences in different ways and having someone to talk that out with can often help us unravel where it has come from and find ways to deal with it if it happens again.

 

That is of course entirely your decision and whatever you decide we are here with you. It is a very caring and compassionate community and we welcome you as part of that now also. Smiley Very Happy

Re: Hello! This is totally new for me.

@gensys astral projection? Out of body experience? Remote viewing?

Re: Hello! This is totally new for me.

Hi @gensys  and welcome to the forums.  I agree, it's brave sharing your story when you first get started here.  I can imagine how bewildering what you've experienced could be, tho I don't have any explanations for you.  I like @Serenity1 's suggestions tho'.  @Serenity1 I don't think we've met before either.  I know there are others here who have auditory stuff sometimes so I'm sure you will find support.   @greenpea  can you suggest anyone? (hope it's ok to tag you here).

I've been through multiple traumatic events myself and think it could also relate to unlocking memories due to the trigger experience you had recently.  This happens to me sometimes.  We can dissociate during the event, to survive it, but I believe the details are still in our memory somewhere.  I've also experienced what I'd call awake dreams that seem very real.  Just a couple of ideas.

Here on the forums we can only speak from our own experiences, so this is my two bob's worth.

Hope you enjoy being here.  I'll tag you both on a social thread that happens on Saturdays where you can meet more people if you'd like to join in.

Have a good day.

Re: Hello! This is totally new for me.

@gensys  Hi gensys and welcome to the forum :). Thanks @eth  for tagging me. I was thinking earlier on to say something but so many people contributed I decided not to lol but since I have experienced almost idental occurances with gensys I suppose it couldn't hurt. I have schizoaffective disorder brought on by trauma and one of my voices I have or did before I was medicated have conversations with. He would for example tell me to dance and I would dance for hours on end until my daughter told me to go to bed.

 

He is my bf and I firmly believe that once I have passed on I will meet up with him again however bizarre that may sound. I have also heard many voices screaming at me in the past from time to time . I would be making an appointment with your trusted gp and be honest with him/ her about your symptoms. Your gp will probably (if they are good) send you onto a psychiatrist. The trick is to be honest with the doctors they can only help you if you are totally straight up with them.

 

ps: I have had physical sensations where my body was totally taken over by my bf. Where I had no control .... so yeah you are not alone.

 

 

Re: Hello! This is totally new for me.

@gensys  Something else has sprung to mind when I was really sick I had the same hallucinations where there were 3 men at the end of my bed and they would tell me all kinds of things they wanted me to do with my body. I could hear them give me instructions which I followed ..... this went on for months. I was a very sick girl at times and yet at other times I was fine .... that is schizoaffective disorder. (not saying you have it btw:))

Re: Hello! This is totally new for me.

Hi @eth nice to meet you thanks for the tag 😭

Re: Hello! This is totally new for me.

Opps ...I meant 😊 Not 😭 Hahaha 😂 @eth

Re: Hello! This is totally new for me.

Formerly Jojo7  did you change your name to @Serenity1 ?  I'm just confused because my Jojo7 notification link took me to Serenity1 posts.

Good to meet you too.  Hope today is peaceful for you.

Re: Hello! This is totally new for me.

@eth hi yes I did change my name yesterday 😊 Sorry about the confusion 💖
Illustration of people sitting and standing

New here?

Chat with other people who 'Get it'

with health professionals in the background to make sure everything is safe and supportive.

Register

Have an account?
Login

For urgent assistance