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chemonro
Senior Contributor

Borderline Personality Disorder

These days I'm diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder. Initially it was clinical depression, then type two bipolar, and now BPD. With complications around... identity and stuff. *waves hands vaguely*

You know I'm not too sure that it's helpful to get all wrapped up in diagnosis? I'm not comfortable being put in a box! Plus I tend to think that these things are spectrums that shade into each other. Nobody's saying you can't have Bi-Polar AND OCD!

Anyway, it's true to say that I've experienced the anxiety, the depression, sometimes really deep, long periods of depression, the highs, the mania, and the identity confusion. And other stuff. Yeah, I've had a lot of stuff go on. They should diagnose me with STUFF!

9 REPLIES 9

Re: Borderline Personality Disorder

I think the STUFF disorder could be a good one, and could fit a lot of things. Actually, not to box the STUFF. It could be a STUFF spectrum! 😄

It can be really hard to find the right diognosis sometimes, especially where the disorder/s are more complicated and require more evaluation. One of the good parts of a correct diognosis is perhaps having the right kind of medications or treatment that are more likely to help.

However, I still agree that we shouldn't have to be 'boxed' either. Two people with the same disorder does not mean they are the exactly the same, interested in the same things or experiencing exactly the same symptoms.

 

Thanks for sharing a bit about you. 🙂

Re: Borderline Personality Disorder

I agree Che, I fit into the stuff category as well. My stuff has included a variety of panic, distorted thoughts, mood swings. Nightmares..what mental health has taught me is that like any other health condition such as asthma, it doesn't discriminate. Pain is pain at whatever age or stage of life you are in..learning to manage it has given me a whole new skill set,and a commitment to work in the field..

Re: Borderline Personality Disorder

Hi Chemonro

I love your comment. 🙂 Yes we all have STUFF! 

Some of us unfortunately far more than most, and apparently that makes us "abnormal". Frankly at 50 I'm over wishing to be normal, in fact pass on that. I'm happy to be me now that I've managed to work out who that is, and discovered I can live with her most of the time :-).

I've spent a lot of my life wanting to be normal and finally come to the conclusion that it doesn't actually exist beyond maths and statistics (& damned lies).

I also agree that one can get way too wrapped up in the diagnosis, which is a most inexact science. Don't be put into a box. A diagnosis may well be something you have or suffer from, but it is not you. A diagnosis (when it is useful) helps you to understand yourself and your behaviour/history better - I believe it should help with self-acceptance, even if that can take some time. (I've also had about 5 different diagnoses over the last 35 years.)

I agree many diagnoses seem to be on a bit of continuum. Increasingly I wonder whether the different diagnoses around are descriptions of different individual responses to trauma - which vary almost as much as individuals do. I guess this would translate as horrendous SH*T happened (however many times) and now I have STUFF.

We are not the boxes, but the descriptions in the boxes can help us or others to understand us better. In fact wearing these difficult and painful mental illnesses can grow us, over time, into people who are much more compassionate, stronger, and more creative than we would ever have been without them. 

Most important and hardest to learn - be compassionate with yourself!

Best regards,

Kristin

Re: Borderline Personality Disorder

"Experts" love classifying people into a box. It validates their "expertise", when really they do not know and are only guessing.  

Re: Borderline Personality Disorder

I've found it's comforting to have the "in-a-box" level classification... it gives me a steady outline.... "Know your enemy" type of thing... You can only beat something if you know its strengths and weaknesses.

 

But, hey, ask me tomorrow and I'll tell you that I don't have anything wrong with me.

Re: Borderline Personality Disorder

Hi Chemonro,

 

I agree with others here that it doesn't really help to get too hung up on a diagnosis. A diagnosis is often something a doctor needs in order to negotiate bureaucracy.

For instance, I heard my psychiatrist on the phone calling my illness "major depression", but I quickly realised that she had to call it that in order to get BPS funding for the drug I was on. Some drugs are only approved for certain conditions and not others. So I got the 'working diagnosis' of Major Depression' for financial reasons! Smiley Wink

What did I care? I was just happy I didn't have to pay 100's of dollars for my medication. Smiley Tongue

A lot of psychiatric drugs have several uses and are used across the board to treat different mental illnesses. So it might be more about treating your symptoms, rather than your illness, as such. I think psychiatrists focus on what symptoms are concerning you, rather than your diagnosis.  

But yeah, they probably do have to give you some kind of label in order to justify to Medicare why they keep treating you! Again; bureaucracy is the issue.

I think a lot of people are worried about being given a label and put in a box - but it might be better to focus on whether or not treatment is actually helping you. If your docor seems kind, caring and respectful, then that is a good start.

Re: Borderline Personality Disorder

Hi Che,

I can understand not wanting to be put in a box. That said, with something like BPD, the disorder can vary in presentation so much and so differently between people that the metaphor means it's a biiiiiig box 😛 I say this because I have a few people (including my girlfriend) in my life with BPD, and they're all very different people, in person and in private.

A label can be useful, in some ways. A label can help a therapist know where to start with possible treatments, and might help a friend or family member do some research, if they want to know more. The problem comes in when people judge based on the label; that's not helpful.

For instance, I'm an introvert. Even with a mild label like that, people have assumed that I'm a hermit, rather than someone who apportions their social life *very* carefully. Similarly, nobody should ever assume that someone with BPD is going to be anything other than themselves, rather than a set of behaviours. Basically, learn about the person, not the label.

So I can understand that you wouldn't like/want the diagnosis. I'd say that it might be useful for guiding treatment, making sure the beauracracy is dealt with with minimal fuss, but in terms of your identity? Perhaps not so much 🙂

BPD

Do I’ve been diagnosed with BPD and have emotional detachment disorder in there to apparently.

I’m currently taking medication and have been for the last 6 or so months.

 

I’m having a lot of trouble lately with dissociating. I feel like sometimes I can’t think, I’m up with the fairies, or when holding a conversation I just can’t remember things.

 

I was wondering if there is anything I can do to help this? It’s really getting to me at the moment. I am on the waiting list to DBT but live in the middle of no where so that’s not an option right now.

 

I’m finding myself lately also very tired, and sleeping a lot and a little irritable. The problem is I really don’t have anything I should be worrying about, life is seeming pretty good other then this. 

Re: Borderline Personality Disorder

PeanutsPsych.jpeg

LOL 💜

@chemonro, 'STUFF' sounds just a credible to me LOL. I've heard your story... raises a lot of questions about psychiatry. Personally, I think BPD is a 'cop out' diagnosis since it's the depression and anxiety part of it they have pills for. My last pdychologist disagreed with my lifelong BPD diagnoses, rather, she says TRAUMA with a capital ' T ' (which equates to complex PTSD). Added to that, in more recent days s 'complicated grief' Yep, I'm with YOU let's just call it STUFF! 💜

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